Are you crazy?
Mark was listening to a podcast a few weeks ago when he realised he had the 'thing' they were talking about - a condition called Aphantasia. It is defined as - "the inability to visualize. Otherwise known as image-free thinking. People with aphantasia don’t create any pictures of familiar objects, people, or places in their mind’s eye. Not for thoughts, memories, or images of the future."
Only 3% of people have this and he was quite blown away when he heard that 97% of people can see pictures in their head. For instance, think about a pink giraffe with orange spots. You can see it, in your head. Mark can't, and never has been able to. He also has limited internal dialogue. When I constantly have thoughts running around he doesn't. He can deliberately think about things but it doesn't happen involuntarily so to speak. Neither of us knew of this as I guess it's not really something you ask someone - hey, you can see pictures in your head like everyone else? Years ago when I was trying to go to sleep and I had the constant chatter going on, I asked Mark what he was thinking. He said nothing! I was like 'what do you mean nothing? You can't have absolutely nothing!' But he could. I just thought he was very good at switching off his dialogue when going to sleep.
Once I told him about a conversation I'd had in my head with him. So I asked him about it, and what he thought at the time. He said he thought I was bat shit crazy! And that time we were in a meditation class? The instructor telling us to try to not listen to our thoughts and to imagine lying on a beach? What did he think then? He thought it was just a load of baloney! Lol. Mark might have been blown away to learn that people see things in their own head, and I was blown away that he didn't! I still can't get over it. Think of an apple. Is it red, green, mixed? Shiny or dull? Nope he sees nothing. He just knows an apple is an apple. Just like my picture this week. He thought 'picture in your mind' was just an expression, a bit like a flying pig!
His family was round the other day so we were telling them all about it. His mum and sister were really surprised. His dad not so much. Turns out he has Aphantasia too. And no body had any idea. Though funnily enough his mum used to ask his dad what he was thinking at sleep time and his dad always replied 'nothing'.
There is a website and a test, which seems to have a sliding scale. Mark was hypo- (number 5) and I was hyper- (number 1) ha ha ha which says it all really!
When people say life is hard, I ask them 'compared to what?'
PS I can't remember if I ever told you but I passed my Microsoft Word course! Just about to start an office admin one. For my sins.
PPS had a busy week driving my friend to hospital. But she's had her cancer cut out which is fab.
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