All or nothing

 

I have a queer thought process when it comes to dieting. If I'm wanting to lose weight I'm all in - healthy, low calories food, lots of walking, refraining from biscuits and cakes. Smashing! But when I'm not actively wanting to lose weight (even though I'm never not wanting to lose weight - but you know what I mean?) I have to be the opposite to all that. Like, I'd never refuse a biscuit if I'm having fish and chips for tea. I won't eat a salad if I'm eating out because people will think a fat person eating a salad is just them trying to lose weight and failing. Even if I really fancy the salad I'll pick the fattening unhealthy food because I'm fat and that's what people expect. It's crackers and I bet no one is even thinking these things anyway. Like today for instance, I'm at my sister's. She's taken the dog for a walk, just half an hour. I could have gone, nice evening etc but I'm lazy when I'm fat and something stops me. What's the point of exercising when I'll eat chocolate later. I know it doesn't make sense but I can't help it. Everyone should feel comfortable going out for a short walk no matter what their dietary needs. I need to sort my head! I'm not all or nothing when it comes to housework by the way. That can be 'that'll do' all the days of the week.

Back to being at my sister's. We've driven down to the Midlands to meet my brand new great-niece, Aoife. Picture above. She's 6 weeks old and sister to Órfhlaith and Maddie. I love tiny babies - though I couldn't eat a full one! Diet or no diet! 

I've been treading water for too long. Things need to change. I have a plan. Good plan? Bad plan? Only time will tell but I have a plan, that's a start.

We give our children two things. One of them is roots and the other are wings.